Below, you'll see any text that was highlighted with comments from the reviewer.
I think the best part of this piece was the amazing descriptions it had. I was really brought into the visual world and I could absolutely imagine everything that was going on inside the tortoise's mind.
Overall, I thought it was really good, but perhaps you could expand more on Charlie's point of view, and the transition between the turtle and Charlie.
Excellent writing! Keep up the great work!