poetic dreams

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Through It All... By Jordan Monique Horne

September 11, 2019

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I tune out the world with my beautiful music. They told me if I had a talent, I should use it. I came up in a small town called Mississippi. It wasn't perfect, you'll hear a few gun news and shootings. Parents kept me away from it all.They were trying not to let me fall. To be honest, it didn't help because my eyes and ears were still bare. It was like the whole world was unfair. It was like no one had no kind of love. Gratefully, we still kept everything pushing and heads up. I had all these dreams, but didn't know what to do. I was always worrying about my life and school. Then, I started escaping through writing and singing skills. I always wanted to help pay my family's bills. Everything in our family wasn't good. Through it all, they still told me to shine as I should. Sometimes I had so many breakthroughs. Since I was raised in the church, I knew what to do. Sometimes my mind will get so frustrated. Through it all, I always focused on getting educated. People always questioned the type of girl I was, my feelings, and my personality. To be honest I don't know how I feel. To be honest, I just want to grow and heal. I just want someone to love me for me. I want everyone to look inside of me. Look inside what has sink. Look inside of what I think. Inside of me is something worth more than gold. There is a girl that's afraid, but also brave. There's a girl that never gives up. There's a girl that can be fixed with love. A girl that doesn't know where's she's going. A girl that can never be defined. A girl that forever wants to shine. A girl that forever gets to thinking. A girl that's always in her feelings. A girl that wants her dreams to come alive. A girl that admires the sunlight. A girl that needs love. A girl that just needs help from above. A girl that wants to enjoy other view sites. I had to learn the hard way that me and a million others are bold and beautiful. We will always be capable and we've been strong and powerful since birth. Sometimes it takes time for someone to understand those things, but trust me you'll know your worth. There might be people like me that couldn't see their worth because of the words others say, the looks they give, the things they do, or the names they call. People talked about my skin, my weight, my personality, and everything. That's when I took a mirror and made it my best friend and had a conversation with it and my body. I said, '' My eyes, my teeth, and my shape. My walk, my style, and my face. My lips, my hips, and my thighs. I am smart. I am beautiful. I am kind. I am black. I am proud. I am a young woman. People laugh, people talk about the skin i'm in. Big mouth, big head, and big nose. Nappy hair, big heart, and strong soul. Wide smile, dark skin, and plus sized. Big feet, hard hands, and brown eyes. I am a sweet brown baby. I was born with beauty and majesty. I am brilliant. People only saw the things that didn't mean anything. My thighs, my size, my style, my smile, my height, my heart, my hair, my hands, my head, the big clear tears that I shed, my lips, my hips, my face, my shape, my feet, my brain, my color, my eyes, my nose, my mouth, my people, and my soul don't define the real person that I am. I am God's wonderful creation, and he made me wonderfully and beautifully complex. It took me a long time to learn how to love my self, and to learn how to get through all the breakthroughs and pain. I am black, beautiful, brave, bold, big, beyond, and brilliant. I am all this in the skin i'm in. Through it all, through it all I an still here, I matter, and I am a warrior all day everyday... through it all.''

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  • September 11, 2019 - 6:47am (Now Viewing)

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