United States

writer of stories, lover of girls


August 15, 2019

    You haven't gone swimming since the diagnosis, and maybe you shouldn't, but you feel so alive teetering on the lake's edge, where a breeze traces the lines of your limbs and cold water laps at your toes. A shriek catches itself on your tongue, tasting of glee and exhilaration and freedom. The lake's surface reflects blurry constellations and you are already anticipating your body slicing through Ursa Major and sending thrills rippling through you; cold, invigorating. The thought alone makes you shiver, as though phantom water droplets are dripping down your thin skin. Enough waiting, you decide. 
    You jump. 

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  • artificialaorta

    i'm writing a review on this right now and i don't want to make it sound silly so i'll say this here:
    that first line is so beautiful im going to mcfreaking lose it

    about 1 year ago
  • AbigailSauble

    Great descriptions. Deliciously real. =)

    about 1 year ago
  • The One Who Searches for Words

    I like the way you use second person. that's something I haven't heard before.

    about 1 year ago
  • fatpanda

    Love to see you back! Great descriptions here, as usual, and how you build the piece up leading to the last line. Also really like the short last sentence. Amazing job, overall, but somehow (maybe it's just me) I feel that this piece is not exactly suitable for this particular contest. When I think 'flash fiction', I think of something that flows fast, not dwells on one topic too long. This is just my opinion though, but know that I thoroughly enjoyed the piece as a whole. Can't wait to see more!

    about 1 year ago
  • Anha

    brilliant piece!! welcome back; it's lovely to see your amazing writing again. the ambiguity of "the diagnosis" fits well with the tone of the piece, and the sheer anticipation is infectious - i feel the excitement of the protagonist creeping under my own skin. amazing writing - a real chance of winning!!

    about 1 year ago
  • The One Who Searches for Words

    What a great way to end the story.

    about 1 year ago