Peer Review by cgintz (United States)

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Fire

By: MarSan


It's a crisp autumn morning and there's a congregation of dark figures around a white casket. Two stand at the front, the others whisper about the pain they must feel. Their father's scorched face stares back at them.

"Someone killed him" she whispers to his brother, dabbing on her cheeks. "It's symbolic"

"Burn him ? He always had enemies, and a tendency to smoke... Although, you don't seem mad about it"

"Bastard deserved it"

He looked stricken.

"Not so loud or you'll lose your part of the will"

"Tell me that when you've washed the cinder off your nails"


Peer Review

It is mysterious and ominous. Makes you think and wonder. It leaves you thinking you know what happend but wanting more of the story.


In the diolougue when they dont tell you who or what the people are talking about but you think you know what is going on.


In the begining when they set the scene. It was a bit to slim. I wish there were more details.


This is an amazing and very intresting story. I went through many emotions while reading it.


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