Peer Review by Goldfish-Bowl (Canada)

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the(yr’)e there

By: tzemmy

There’s a monster living under my bed. He’s friends with the one who lives in my closet. They talk about me when I’m not around, but never answer my questions. I never see them, but I know they're there. I hear their stomachs growl at night and smell their breath on my t-shirts. They eat the marbles that fall out of my head and keep me company when I cry. I know they're there.
My mother asks why I’m always up late, and I always say,
“Monsters live in my room!”
She always replies,
“Hush hush, there there.”

Message to Readers

Any feedback is helpful!

Peer Review

Title! Really nice!

"he's friends with the one living in my closet" smoothly introduces the character's imagination as well as the setting.

There were no parts where I didn't understand what was happening, although I do wonder if the monsters are friendly or if the child is scared of them. That isn't necessarily a bad thing to leave ambiguous though!

Keep on writing! You have created an excellent story in under 99 words!

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