Below, you'll see any text that was highlighted with comments from the reviewer.
Message to Readers
This is the beginning of my Camp NaNoWriMo July project this year! I'm hoping to publish it after all of it's edited, hopefully traditionally. Leave a comment if you want me to continue posting it here, and feel free to review! :D
The beginning utilized an interesting technique and perspective. that I haven't seen very often! The unique point of view made the intro more compelling, and the narrator's distinct voice was entertaining.
I would try to use more complicated adjectives and verbs. Although the simple vocabulary allows for the piece to be easily understandable, it was hard for me to visualize because there weren't a lot of descriptions and specifics. Also, I'm still a bit confused about Riley's backstory. I think the story would benefit from having more details about how her dad joined the gang and taught them all to steal.
Overall, I think you're off to a promising start! Although some areas could use some tightening up, it is a very interesting premise, and I'd like to see where the story goes. Also, good luck with Camp NaNoWriMo! I participated in last fall's NaNoWriMo, so I understand how taxing yet rewarding it can be.