Peer Review by bride124 (United States)

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Drowning

By: Oven


FREE WRITING

Swirling downward,
into the darkness.

Never to see the light again.

Air,
life,
freedom,
gone.

Floating to the surface, 
only to sink back down again.

Imagining a world of freedom,
and laughing at the thought of it.

Air, 
life,
freedom,
gone.

Sinking downward,
staying there.

Giving up on freedom,
and accepting this fate.

Drowning,
in the depths of the ocean,

In the ocean of homework. 

 


Peer Review

The ending makes the whole poem more funny, comical and interesting.


What do you do after you drown? Do you finally finish your homework?


Reviewer Comments

This is a incredible piece!