Wicked!

India

ENFP-T

Daydreaming and procrastinating more than is healthy.

Writer's block and sleep deprivation are my constant companions.

"People are not to be blamed for their doubts, but that they make no effort to arrive at the truth."
—W.H. Davies

Message to Readers

This is for amohn04's #tellastory contest as well as for KiwiCat's contest. Go check them out!

Feedback is greatly appreciated. I don't mind harsh criticism at all, so be brutally honest.

The First #tellastory

October 29, 2019

FREE WRITING

16
“This view is just amazing,” she says, peering out of a viewing aperture.

I go and stand next to her. The sight is certainly stunning. The galaxy looks splendid when you see it with your own eyes.

“It’s beautiful. But not more than my girl,” I say.

She laughs and gives me a peck.

“I can’t believe that we were the only volunteers for this. Would you ever get to see this on Earth, with that stay-within-the-designated-limits-or-you’ll-die-of-radiation crap?” she says.

 “Not everyone’s that dauntless, you know.”

“Well, I’m glad that you aren’t one of those pussies”, she says, wrapping her arms around me, "Or I’d never have met you”.

“So. Tomorrow’s the day. You’ll become the first person to actually step out of our Galaxy.”

“Yeah. I’m so excited, I think I might forget to collect the samples when I get out there”, she giggles.

“You’d better go and sleep now. You need the rest. I need to do some more tinkering with the controls.”

“Okay, then.Good night.”

She kisses me and goes off.

*****

After I’m sure that she has slept, I reach out behind her pod, pull out the wires that I’ve already marked, and go to my own pod to sleep.

In a few minutes, she’ll die of asphyxia.

Tomorrow, I’ll become the first person to step out of our Galaxy.

They had thought that I wasn’t good enough for the job. They had thought that I’d better be a backup, in case anything goes wrong.

Well, now it will. The astronaut they thought was impeccable will die because she didn’t set the oxygen gauge correctly—or so they’ll think when I’m done—and I’ll have to do her job instead.

Tomorrow, I’ll become the first person to step out of our Galaxy.

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14 Comments
  • >_the stranger_<

    I love how you always end your pieces. the endings are always really perfect. :)


    8 months ago
  • KiwiCat ʕ•ᴥ•ʔ

    RESULTS ARE UP!


    8 months ago
  • Wicked!

    @KiwiCat
    Well, if they if dating or not is up to the reader's interpretation :)
    Can't wait to see the results!


    9 months ago
  • KiwiCat ʕ•ᴥ•ʔ

    Were they dating?! Because that is sooooo MEAN! Thanks for entering my 'story with a twist' contest! Can't wait to publish the results!


    9 months ago
  • Wicked!

    @FoxLilly106 thank you!


    9 months ago
  • Deleted User

    Holy crap! That plot twist. Were they dating or something!? That's messed up that he/she would do that! Great read!


    9 months ago
  • Wicked!

    @Juliana thank you :)


    12 months ago
  • Juliana

    Wow, great ending!


    12 months ago
  • Wicked!

    @bride124 I did, in fact, take part in that contest, though my entry was another piece that I REALLY needed a review for.


    about 1 year ago
  • bride124

    I feel that you should check this out: https://writetheworld.com/groups/1/shared/114689/version/218670


    about 1 year ago
  • Wicked!

    Thank you @Lovegood_24!


    about 1 year ago
  • Lovegood_24

    Echoing Pooja M., I love the plot twist!


    about 1 year ago
  • Wicked!

    Thank you so much, Pooja!


    about 1 year ago
  • Pooja M.

    i love this so much! the unexpected plot twist caught me so off guard! wow.


    about 1 year ago