Peer Review by inkyscribbles (United States)

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The Feeling Of Depression

By: ~DreamerGirlLostInAColorlessWorld~


FREE WRITING

My words are slowly leaving me,
I haven’t much left to write.
My voice is slowly fading,
My words come out as barely a croak.
My colors are slowly leaving,
The world is in dark grey.
I don’t know why this is,
I don’t know anyways to fix it.
My body is translucent,
I’m slowly disappearing.
I grab on to something,
And try to stay strong.
But it doesn’t matter,
Nothing seems to be able to fix what’s wrong.
Then in a flash I’m gone,
All that’s left is a hollow shell of the girl I used to be.
I wonder if anyone will notice,
Or if anyone will see.
But no, they don’t,
My “friends” hang out with me,
And they seem to not notice anything amiss.
My “family” hug me and send love,
And they don’t seem to notice that I’m gone.
Sadness creeps over me,
I lay down and a darkness sweeps over me.
I may never leave this fuzzy haze,
It seems like this is where I’ll spend the rest of my days.
 
 


Message to Readers

I wrote this recently and no I'm not depressed at least not anymore. I used my past experience of my battles with depression and this is the end result. Many people ask "What's depression feel like?" and this is my way of answering that question. So let me know how you feel about this poem and what's your opinion on it.


Peer Review

I really liked the way that you put friends and family in quotation marks. It really captures the feelings of abandonment and unbelonging that someone who is depressed with experience.


This question is always really hard for me too answer because I only read pieces that seem to interest me and I only review pieces that I liked to show appreciation. Really this is perfect. My best friend was depressed and this poem just reminded me of the thoughts she would share with me. Maybe add something about what brought you into the light. Maybe playing the guitar, laying in the grass, walking through the woods, petting your rabbit. That would add a appreciation for something that helped you through your time of hurt. I know when my BFF was depressed One Direction was her go to happiness. Besides me :)


Reviewer Comments

I really like the last line. Honestly you could make that a writing prompt for a short story!