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Skylar Bell

United States

Blind Side

March 22, 2016

Okay. We get it. You're trying to improve your skills, but listen to me, girl, your skills suck. You can practice on your free time but take it off when you're done. If you wear crappy makeup in public, and I see you, prepare yourself to be made fun of.
How can these girls be orange, like did you really buy 20 shades darker foundation on purpose because you have this desiring dream to look like the orange in your fridge. Or did you just so happen to get your summer and winter foundation mixed up. Also, how do girls find spray tans attractive? Like girl, you aren’t tan you are orange and trust me we all notice. If you wear foundation, at least, invest in a beauty blender.
Let's not walk around looking like we got punched in the face. Your “Kylie Jenner” lips look like Maranda Sings lips. If you can not overline your lips right then here is a tip do not overline them. If you do you just look like clown. It’s actually sad because kids are scared of clowns. Therefore when a kid sees you in public they will run away screaming. Then you will wonder what you could have done to this poor child.  You could have prevented this by just not overlining your lips.
Your eyebrows look like you took a sharpie and drew them in. Your eyebrows do not match your hair. Could you at least try a little harder to make them look just a tiny bit more natural.
You look like you put your makeup on while wearing an invisible blindfold. Is it really that hard like come on at least don’t post an Instagram picture. EVERYONE is making fun of you and laughing at you. We are all wondering what bus company we need to sue for hitting you in the face. Also, what dog is responsible for the crap on your face.
You don’t need to wear your eyeliner all the way up to your forehead it's not like your gonna fly away. You could invest in better products than eyeliner if you are trying to fly away. For instance you have the options of the following: a Jet, plane, flying saucer, pet pterodactyl, jetpack, unicorn, magic carpet, and even a helicopter.
You have a brown streak down your cheek that's not contour. Do you know that you're supposed to blend? Do you even know what blending is? YOU HAVE TO BLEND.
I don’t understand why you clump your mascara are you trying to make your eyelashes look like fly legs. It’s gross the way all your eyelashes clump together like magnets.
Let us get to the point: if you think your ugly wear a paper bag because your makeup looks worse than your natural face. In conclusion, I titled this paper blind side, because of these reasons: Girls that apply their makeup this way could have done in a dark room and couldn’t see. Most the girls in my paper are just blind to what others see. They don’t know their spray tans look orange. We, their fellow surroundings, try telling them but I swear their deaf to our helpful comments/ suggestions. I’m not exactly sure why these beautiful ladies don’t listen to our wonderful life tips, like you should go get your skin color matched for your foundation. I don’t find these comments rude or insulting I look at them as friendly advice. Well that is until my mother is doing it. I mean who would take makeup or fashion advice from their 40 something mother? Not me, Definitely not me.


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  • March 22, 2016 - 2:20pm (Now Viewing)

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