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"ending a sentence with a preposition is something up with which i will not put."

Message to Readers

i’d love to receive constructive feedback! please comment or review so i can know what you think.

p u l l i n g m e a p a r t

June 5, 2019


yesterday my fingers prized apart
glassy sheep flesh, cerebrum cerebellum
brain stem fresh on shaking fingers
and we peeled away layer layer layer
inspecting fearing and maybe the madness
drove it too far—we quenched we quested
that lovely longing, forgotten crime,
and how i loved that scalpel.  i skewered
frontal lobe drove past memory smell
parental instinct landed with coordination
and pulled away dark veins, a tangled
vine smothered in milk muscle memory
love lust lore, my science my education
my pen my paper and writing but the
hand shakes with care with envy punctures
midnight into templates and all for science
all for wanting science.  five minutes to
lunch i am hungry i am sick hands cramp
to meat-searching talons and i wish i could
forget but it’s on my fingers on my palms
the noodles crush under teeth but maybe there are
neurons crunching under the spaghetti
and it throbs it squeezes under voluntary
jaws and i love it i hate it, force hands
under faucet, scrub soap on blistering
formaldehyde, essence of brain, essence
​of living of breathing of loving of dying and
maybe the same could be said for me maybe
my mind was stabbed and stirred and
sickened under seventh grade hands under
loving hands, memory and smell and emotion
pulled like plugs, brain stem torn and now
i’m paralyzed; now they’ve pulled me apart


See History
  • June 5, 2019 - 11:18am (Now Viewing)

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  • Pi_Pen

    Wow. This blew me away. Stunning description; I love how this poem expresses all the emotions you felt. I particularly love, "...under voluntary / jaws and i love it i hate it, force hands / under faucet, scrub soap on blistering / formaldehyde, essence of brain, essence / of living of breathing of loving of dying...." Wonderful.

    over 1 year ago
  • jewel

    i love this so much!!! the use of italics is so brilliant in the way that it breaks the poem apart
    with abrupt, interrupting ideas but also pulls it together. i also loved how the italics and specific use of punctuation added to the powerful intensity. great job on this!!!

    over 1 year ago
  • r|A|i|N

    ah, thank you!

    over 1 year ago
  • bride124

    I feel that you should check this out: https://writetheworld.com/groups/1/shared/114689/version/218670

    over 1 year ago
  • asteria

    chilling, disturbing, intense. i love love love it! you have no problem delving into more squeamish & disturbing topics, and it enthralls me every time. you have a talent, & i keep coming back for more :)

    over 1 year ago
  • r|A|i|N

    yeah, i always find dissection far more disturbing than educational. it just feels wrong. everyone was shredding up the brains and pulling them apart and that was someone’s entire essence, their reason for existence. and we were chopping it up and throwing it away.

    over 1 year ago
  • A Breath Into Silence

    I can relate. So much. Our biology class dissected sheep's hearts, which are around the same size as a human's, and it really got to me.

    On a positive note, I'm always enthralled by your style; it's so powerful! The italics really hammered your points home.

    over 1 year ago