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It drew me in with the point of view and memory.
Social media is a problem, and though it can't be taken out of society, society can learn to use it better.
I liked this person's writing style, and the way the information was introduced worked well.
I don't think so. I enjoy the personal bits of information that was littered about but used correctly and appropriately in the correct places.
You've got this, this is a good piece of work.
I like that you didn't tell others that they had to opt out as you have done but just suggested it. I did a writing piece also on this topic, but unlike yours, I didn't do an argumentative essay on it, I did a test. No social media for one week. In the end, I ended up being more in the moment and chose to not delete it, but use it more wisely. (Self-promo, skip if you want) I recommend checking out my essay, to see the entirety of the week and the other lessons that I learned.