Below, you'll see any text that was highlighted with comments from the reviewer.
Message to Readers
Be kind, honest and yourself. xx
Before reading your piece, I had never thought about bread like this before. The perspective you take is extremely unique. I love how you stay constant with the topic of bread, and utilize it in so many ways. You talk about the how bread is a staple in any country, about breaking bread, and even tied it into your country's culture. Amazing work!
The way you introduced your essay sets the scene for how bread is important in any culture. You mention specifically how bread is important in German culture, and in French culture. Then, you take it a step further to comment on how we don't "break bread enough." I loved the references you used, such as "...the greatest thing since sliced bread," or "breaking bread." This brings language the readers are familiar with into play when discussing your topic.
Maybe provide more information on "Bread for the World" in case the reader wants to get involved.
Yes, definitely! I love the way you begin. In the first paragraph, there might be some sentences that you could make clearer and easier to read, just so that the into is a bit crisper. For example, maybe take out some of the contractions (it's, you'll) to improve clarity.
The way you walk through the story and topic is phenomenal, and the way you describe and write about something as simple as bread is truly incredible. Amazing piece! I will never look at bread the same way again!