Peer Review by hmkeselman (United States)

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when i say, what i mean, what you do

By: xvwriting

when i say, colour me bright
i mean use your crayons to landscape vibrance.
but you smoke my lungs, and filter my verdance
in gray scyscraper dullness.

when i say, eat my fruit,
i mean enjoy a delicacy,
not barren my soul:
a gluttony i cannot behold.

when i say, use me carefully
i mean use me. but let me live
but you kill me the very instant
i give you a consented nod.

when i say, fill my void, my emptiness,
i mean render it with love and hope,
but you distend it with scourings of debrised carrion offal.
i try to let it weave close my broken shards of hope.

when i say, celebrate my species,
i mean, give them a chance to live in my world,
but you find a way to integrate a recipe for death,
and serve it at your luncheon.

when i say, live and let live,
i mean co-existence
but you shoot me where it hurts most:

-from mother Earth, to every human.

Peer Review

I love how complex the language is. As a reader, it feels like dripping honey. There is elegance and lavishness to the words, and yet the poem is still sensical. I can feel the emotion through the intricate descriptions.

There are always stakes when one writes, because to write is to bare one's sole. I think that whenever someone is brave enough to offer up a piece of their soul, their thoughts, in the form of poetry, it has an impact. It sparks empathy and inspiration, and it encourages the reader to write.

I want to know if there has been a change. If you are able to voice this to the internet, have you been able to voice it to the person?

The authenticity and delicacy of your poetry is lovely to read. Keep writing because you have something to say, something that we can all relate to.

Reviewer Comments

AMAZING! I really liked this piece