Although I've tried to open my eyes to look upon light
I find myself unable, and I find myself blind
And I find myself doubtful and find myself scared
And I find myself ambling and gambling for time
And though I've held close the "love of my life"
I find myself thinking that he isn't mine
And find myself blinking away pointless tears
And find myself drinking more bottles tonight
And though I've tried to still all the shakes
Of my hands made bleeding by bones that they break
I find myself staring, despairing in awe
As I'm paring raw flesh off of muscle
And though I've tried to silence the sobs
The unpleasant wailing that tears from my throat
I find myself shrieking like a wounded animal
Tears leaking and seeking a shoulder to land on
And though I've tried to stable my mind
To silence the torrents tearing from inside
I find myself falling and brawling with thoughts
And I swear I hear Hell itself calling my name
And though I've tried to pry out the fight
The bit of me claiming I'm not in the right
I find myself stumbling and fumbling about
And I find myself mumbling with words that aren't mine.
