Below, you'll see any text that was highlighted with comments from the reviewer.
The writer draws me into the op-ed by beginning the article with a scary statistic and by appealing to pathos, logos, and ethos.
The legalization of firearms on all public colleges in Georgia is an illogical recipe for disaster; it puts thousands in danger and creates a hostile learning environment.
The writer utilizes statistics, deductive reasoning, and an emphasis on the importance of safety to convince her readers to believe that guns are unfit for college campuses.
As a firm believer that guns to not belong on college campuses, I completely agree with this piece, but I think that the writer should heighten the ridiculousness of the legislation by using humor, satire, and other rhetorical devices.
Generally speaking, this Op-Ed piece is well organized and to the point, but the author should improve her transition sentences and include prevalent examples to back up her claims (3rd paragraph).
You're off to a great start! I love the topic you chose, and your ideas are concrete and logical.
I would like to see you vary your sentences and include more dashes, strong verbs, and adjectives to spice up your writing. Also, don't think too hard about creating smooth transition sentences... your writing demonstrates that you're on the right track-- just try to make it flow! Take advantage of the edits I gave you, and keep up the good work! (: