Peer Review by Princess Maria (United States)

Below, you'll see any text that was highlighted with comments from the reviewer.

Tap on comment to view. Using a mouse?

Hover over comments to view. On a touch device?


An Angel

By: Okapi


This morning you were fine 
Lovely and divine
But now you’ve gone
To where I cannot follow
And my heart has filled with such sweet sorrow
Now you cannot suffer
No pain or any other
Now you can rest
I know that this is best
Alone no more
In heaven at last
 

 
 


Message to Readers

This poem is about my pet mouse Mielita who I adore, but she sadly passed away a few months ago. I hope you like it.


Peer Review

It makes me think of peace and acceptance of death. Like, it is bittersweet.


Maybe some more description about Mielita would be nice. And perhaps tell more of a story about her death so that readers can feel the whole impact.


"Now you can rest." It seems like Mielita only fell into a long sleep, and it sounds lots nicer than just saying she is dead.


Your work kinda reminds me of Ernest Hemingway's. It is beautiful and emotional through its clarity and simplicity.
The title is great too!


No additional comments.