Peer Review by weirdo (United States of America)

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lost

By: rosemarywisdom


FREE WRITING



don't pretend you aren't what you are

one in billions

trillions

even more

why are you destroying our chance?

why do you run, little one?

why do you stray?

focus

you mustn't flinch when it all crumbles away

this is a destiny spun for me by fate itself

and now it belongs to you as well

i hoped one day you'd follow in my footsteps

but even then

sooner or later

you would disappoint me

i had such high hopes for you


Message to Readers

musings


Peer Review

beautiful piece!


it is a little bit confusing. i had to read it once or twice in order to understand what was happening. maybe expand a little?


Reviewer Comments

one more review left to go!