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Message to Readers
still probably a wip but i just want to publish it to get feedback! tell me how you feel about this
What's surprising is the way this connects to Mexican culture. You used dialect, slang, and ideals within this piece that I really enjoyed and understood as I read the references. For example, 'gringos' was not only used correctly, but stereotypically and accurately like it's used now in the Spanish language. Everything about this story seems thought out and well planned and I really enjoyed that. You seemed to keep everything well put together and have just the right amount of information/background to keep the reader on their seats but not confused. That's amazing writing skills. I loved the ending! It not only talks about how the character feels but leaves the reader themself with goosebumps. Favorite Lines: "Her body's been frozen with cold ice that burns to the touch" This is not only metaphorically powerful but also is different. I love how you put froze and burns together, because though alone they would contradict one another, you put it together and made it work.
Personal Questions: How much did you base off the original legend? It's interesting to see what remained or how it was perceived, and what you've added. There were some parts where you had serious repetition and it was nice and added, but after a while, it did seem to get just repetitive and didn't add to the piece. However, this is a huge personal preference. If you were to deepen anything, perhaps the background of the characters. I know it's probably not relevant to this legend, but if you wanted to it could add to the piece. I like the mystery of the stranger, but what about Magdalena? Did she grow up the town gossip or take over for her mother? Was she always like this? Lastly, I liked the title, but I feel as though it doesn't do this piece justice. There's so much more to the story from metaphors to meaning, that goes beyond the dogs' eyelashes. But I do understand why you used that title.
Wonderful writing! Keep writing!