Peer Review by Suri Purefoy (United States)

Below, you'll see any text that was highlighted with comments from the reviewer.

Tap on comment to view. Using a mouse?

Hover over comments to view. On a touch device?


Their Ends

By: Angela Soria


PROMPT: Quartet

Sage Thistlefoot

She laid in a pool of wine and blood, her breathing grew ever more shallow. 
Her long silver hair swirled gently beside her. This was the end and she accepted it.

Vonda Silverfeather

She was silent even as the sword pierced her heart.
Her only regret was leaving her companions behind.

Lucius Fear

Water began to fill his lungs, he couldn't breathe.
He reached up to the light peircing the water's surface, before
his vision faded to black.

Each character is one that I've played in an RPG game at my school, all of which meet a different demise. 
 

Peer Review

Sage: "This was the end and she accepted it." This gave Sage's dying a peaceful glint.
Vonda: "Her only regret was leaving her companions behind." This made me think that Vonda was an amazing, caring person.
Lucius: "He reached up to the light" He didn't want to die.


Sage: How did she get in this position and why was she so willing to leave her life?
Vonda: I would be joyed to have known this character!
Lucius: What was his life before?


Reviewer Comments

I really would love to know more about all of these characters and what got them to this point in their lives.
I love how all of them were at a heart-wrenching point in their lives—that really made me want to have known the character in person.
If you ever write more about these characters, I am sure to be the first to read and love!