Peer Review by inkyscribbles (United States)

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the fault is mine

By: starry eyed


FREE WRITING

The fault is mine.
Yet I still sit here
and pity myself,
I guess this is why
I am such a terrible person
I screw up and
still manage to make 
myself a victim.
why do I have to be this way?
A 4.0 means nothing
as I am stupid
stupid
stupid.
Heartless.
Even the brightest light 
could not love
the darkness that I am cloaked in.
I deserve nothing
Even death would be too kind
the fault is mine. 
I accept
this guilt
I will carry it as if
it were my book bag
My thoughts hurt me,
pounding
rushing.
But I deserve it.
What shell 
of a human being 
I am.
That I must continue
to remind
myself
that
the fault is mine.

sorry this is such a downer! it was a sleepless night for me so I tried to get my thoughts on paper to finally fall asleep (spoiler alert: I didn't)

Peer Review

I can't say much in this piece delighted me but it was very moving. You were able to let us deep into your thoughts and your feelings with just using words. It's hard to do that and you did well.


There's nothing else I need to know you used powerful words and know where to put them.


Reviewer Comments

If you aren't feeling loved I got to tell you that I know someone who does (not to get all religious on you) but his name is Jesus. And he loves you so much he died for you. Check out some of my writing to know more about him if you want. And remember you are loved.