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Message to Readers
Repost + small edits for N and ADM's contest!
I loved that you did paternal love! This was the first submission holding that, and N. and I hadn't thought many people would interpret the prompt that way.
I'd like to know further more on the family life. Is Katie's mom there? Who is she, and what are she and the father to each other? Exes, divorced, widows, married something like that. How was Katie raised? Details like that.
This did move a little bit slow, but it does work for what you wrote. To be honest, I had something that was really constructive, but I don't remember it.