Peer Review by RockSugar98 (Singapore)

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Numb to the Shadows

By: Verena


PROMPT: Setting as Mood

A mysterious young woman stands at the entrance of a dark alley, her sharp and calculating eyes burning holes into the backs of passerby. The frigid wind whips her hair around her face, the pale moonlight shining over the darkened street. Laughter and the sound of harsh footsteps can easily be heard from the shadowed entrance of the alley, the people drunken on the idea of getting home to their warm house's. Moss grows on the side of the old brick buildings, their tall frames slowly falling apart after years of abandonment. The air is brisk and filled with the painful reminder that winter shall soon be upon the now broken city. The moonlight coated young woman takes a deep breath and feels the chilled air catch in her throat. It was time to go home, home to her bed that swept her into the sweet allure of slumber. 


Peer Review

"The moonlight coated young woman takes a deep breath and feels the chilled air catch in her throat" I could picture her coat with a splash of silver moonlight as her throat becomes equal parts painful and dry simultaneously. I love how you paint these experiences and breathe life into your character.


At first it was really dark, ominous and gloomy but towards the end I sense a fatigue-laced joy and relief of the craving for a good night's sleep. So it's a very relatable tale with hints of familiarity since all we want at the end of each tiring day is to sleep it off. I love how you encapsulate this message nicely in your beautiful prose.


Reviewer Comments

Nicely done with your surrealistic descriptions! I really enjoyed how you described her beguilering eyes and how they seemed to be really fierce when she was just tired beyond repair. I like how the whole scene appears to be bleak and forlorn to represent her inner-self as exhausted, barely-surviving and in desperate need of a rejuvenation. I have enjoyed your story to the utmost, especially the lovely language used which brings me to her realm as well. Keep writing! :)